guest blog from daniel

TO SUCKLE THE DOUGH THROW

Citizens everywhere are discovering a new state of social consciousness.
"What is so pleasing about picking up a ball of pizza dough
and hurling it at the most innocent looking bystander
in a twenty yard radius?", you may ask yourself.
Indeed, it seems ridiculous to countless confounded Americans
that the mere sight and sound of a dart of flour and water
smacking righteously against an unsuspecting,
recently bathed and cosmeticized cheek
could elicit such joy.
And yet millions have found satisfaction by the execution of this ritual,
and the satisfied smiles of those such as the participants shown here lend credence to its
subtle power and purpose.
As they, the dough junkies themselves, suggest,
perhaps for one to question the significance thereof
simply points to the fact that one has not tried it for oneself.
Reversion is the term many scholars have come to know it by,
while hosts of common street dwellers continue to evolve its diction:
"pelting", "numbing", "doughing," or simply "doing the dough".
No one is sure just quite how this phenomenon came about
or even how to precisely define it,
but experts all agree it spawns from an innate desire
to act approximately as one did as a third grader.
No deliberation necessary,
simply grab a ball and launch,
sit back and watch the curvaceous honeys flock
to give you attention,
as the shit, quite literally, hits the fan.

Live from the Dank Palace,
I'm Maniel Dankovitch...Ron?